It's almost terrible how reading about something interesting makes me happy to be alive in this world. I want to be surrended by books and magazines and internets and pretty useless things that are lovely to look at. I want to have cats and take care of them as they would take care of me. I want to have a job that doesnt kill my spirit and earns me money. I want to have more money so i can buy all these material things that are not-so-material at the end. I want to gain independance, slowly but surely from my parents. Cos one day i want to have my own place where i'll put my own things, all these lovely things to look at. I want to take care of my insides so that my outside looks better so that i love better my bf. I don't want to change the world, i just want my world to be better. This is a good feeling, im trying, im hoping. My personal doom mixed with hope.